There are two types of shopping - solo shopping and social shopping.
Solo shopping is, as the name suggests, when you go shopping by yourself. These shopping trips are for basic needs such as groceries or everyday clothing. This would include cotton underwear, t-shirts, unisex jeans, flat and comfortable shoes, flannelette pyjamas, etc.
Social shopping is when you shop with a friend (or friends if you're lucky enough to have more than one). This type of shopping is solely reserved for non-essential and totally inappropriate items such as bikinis you will never wear, a pair of jeans to join the other 19 pairs in your wardrobe, a new handbag, anything from the perfume and make-up counter, most jewellery, and shoes which weren't meant for walking. Everything must be purchased at full price.
I don't like solo shopping. It's stupid and a waste of time. Social shopping is my passion. I'm quite good at it. I was taught by a friend who is a master at it. Unfortunately we now live in different states which means we only get to social shop once or twice a year. This has become even more depressing since discovering that none of my new found friends really "get" social shopping. I have one friend who clearly tries, but just doesn't get the concept. She proudly "status updated" that she bought 3 pairs of shoes in one go! I was impressed by this yet also a bit concerned as it turns out she was solo shopping at the time. Upon further investigation it turns out she bought those 3 pairs at K-Mart for a total of $59, AND at least 2 of those pairs were flat and comfortable. What a ridiculous waste of time.
Today I was hoping for a win. I went shopping with another friend for the specific purpose of finding her an outfit for our Melbourne Cup lunch next week. (For those that are unaware, the Melbourne Cup is a horse race which requires everyone to dress up, wear big hats, drink a lot of alcohol and avoid getting glassed at Swell). I was excited to be going social shopping and was salivating over the possibilites.....hats to be tried on, dresses to be squeezed into and shoe heels to be measured. Unfortunately my best laid plans came crashing down when I rang her to arrange a place to meet and she suggested Colorado. FFS. Comfortable cotton clothes that they make up to a size 18! What the hell was she thinking?!
So anyway, my day went from anticipation and excitement to comfortable shoes from Colorado, sneakers from Athletes Foot and an oversized top from Noni B. Not to be deterred, I did manage to get her to try on two completely inappropriate dresses and although she chose not to purchase them, I came away with the feeling that I may have had just a little win.